In the Original Learning Approach I write about autonomy from a collective point of view. Rather than an individualistic sense of autonomy - everyone has the right to do what they want - it is more about having a sense of being valued and participating within a community. Where each individual can feel safe and brave to be themselves together with others.
As I begin to look deeper into the neuroscience of autonomy (see references below) I begin to see that the neuroscience backs up this collective autonomy - that it is impossible to make all decisions about oneself free from the needs, opinions and desires of others - unless we lack empathy, understanding and humanity, and narcissistic tendencies dominate egocentric decisions disregarding the well-being and opinions of others.
Play is play. To me it is autonomy in this collective sense - the ability to make choices, to act, to react, to interact, to lead and to follow, to watch and to participate, it is a positive energy that enables us to thrive and evolve in togetherness even when alone.
If we take away people’s choice-making abilities we will see dire consequences… Oppression is the lack of autonomy (often resulting in low self-esteem) and it can cause many symptoms, such as:
stress
addiction
domestic violence
emotional abuse
communication problems
worry and anxiety
guilt, and
anger (1)
In children there is much they do to establish their own sense of autonomy - play is a vital language of autonomy - and if their play is being heavily audited and controlled by adults then they will resort to refusing food, refusing to sleep, refusing to put certain clothes on etc as ways to gain a sense of power over themselves.
In groups of children where I overhear the phrase “you can’t come to my birthday party” I make the assumption that this comes from a place where this child does not feel empowered - and that this statement temporarily provides the feeling that they are seeking. Instead of banning talking about birthday parties at preschool (I have worked at places that have done that) we need to address the underlying issue - how can we empower the children so that these phrases are not needed? Birthdays are incredibly important days for children, their parties very much so, why on earth would we ban talking about this important day? I assume it is because there has been a failure to understand what these statements are actually about, or it’s easier to deal with it by not letting it happen (often out of concern that those being threatened have their feelings hurt - but this is another story - how do we practice recovering from having our feelings hurt if these kinds of events are prevented - and hurt feelings are not the same as being bullied or oppressed - we should always intervene then) or maybe there is a lack of understanding about what we can do as educators to create an atmosphere of togetherness that doesn’t compromise autonomy - my book on Original Learning basically has this as it’s focus - how we can create communities of learners that celebrates the group and the diversity of individuals within the group and their abilities to collaborate.
What has always been important to me as a mother and as an educator is that the children feel that they are valued, they can participate, and that they can influence - that what they say is taken seriously and when possible put into action - and when not possible explained why. As both mother and educator I would say that my no means no unless they had a good argument as to why I should change my mind - whining and nagging would not work, but a good reason might - and “my” children from preschoolers upwards have come up with various reasons as to why I should change my minds - some have been fabulous ideas that could not work in reality and we talked them through and there was acceptance as to why the no still stood - other times the reason was poorly thought through, and an explanation helped them see that too - but then there were other times when there reasons changed my no into a yes, and we made a few changes so it could happen. It was also important for the children to know that my decisions were firstly rooted in safety, secondly on my knowledge and experience of the feasibility, thirdly economics, fourthly from a social justice point of view and lastly from a pedagogical/developmental point of view.
So basically if it was safe to do, I needed to consider if it was possible for us to do (I have had requests to visit other countries!!!), if it was possible could we afford it? If we could afford it would it be fair to everyone or exclude some or be offensive to some? And if it was fair, I would think about the pedagogy and developmental point of view and if it would be detrimental to either, and if not, then to understand the potential and what I needed to do so that they children could maximise their experience naturally. But this process was not something I kept to myself, but one I shared with the children - sometimes the children could suggest how to make it safe, or possible, or come up with an alternative that was affordable and fair - the pedagogy bit was my responsibility - but they were always welcome to let me know what they wanted to learn in fact we has a GPDR (in Swedish MPGR) Goal. Plan. Do. Reflect.
This involved asking the children if they had a learning goal at the start of the academic year - some wanted to learn to write, others to jump off a certain climbing frame, while others to be able to draw something specific - they were incredibly personal and always connected to what interested the children.
So we wrote down their Goal. We then planned together - they told me what they thought they needed to be able to achieve their goal so that I could provide the time and resources, I would also make suggestions - especially if the goal was big and needed to be broken into steps of mini-goals to get there. It was then for me to keep up my end of the bargain and for them to do the things they needed to do to achieve their goal. Once done we reflected on how it went and whether or not they wanted to make a new goal - some did others didn’t. But for me the most important part was experiencing this process at least once a year. It reminded them that I was there to scaffold their learning - not there to teach and control them.
The school system is constantly pressuring the preschool system to be more like them… yet the school system is devoid of genuine autonomy, instead it is oppressive and authoritarian by nature - which is ever evident in the need for children and youths to seek out ways to empower themselves - too frequently at the cost of the well-being of peers through bullying, discrimination and othering. Children won’t need to do this if they feel adequately empowered. Creating environments that are safe and brave are about cultivating a collective autonomy.
The school system should be looking to those preschools where autonomous learning and play are creating thriving spaces of inclusive education - this is why I wrote the Original Learning Approach and subsequently my Swedish book on risky play and teaching - the final words being that it is not risky play that I advocate but autonomy, where we as adults need to learn how to hold children in safety without compromising their need to challenge the edge of their capacity and feel the thrill of discovering the world - and also without thrusting them beyond their capacity to where they feel unsafe, insecure and not yet ready to meet those challenges.
It’s not about fighting for freedom to do whatever we want. Autonomy is about fighting for freedom from oppression so that together we can be better.
In the above image I think it is the bridges that atracted me to the idea that this could be collective autonomy (the other images were laughable - one was a car!! I think auto was in the thinking). But I think bridges/connections are important - each island/thought/idea/person can be unique and “beautiful/useful” - but also more than that because it is connected to others.
I am me and I have value in being me - but together with others I become something more - and being able to be with others without forfeiting my own identity is to me one of the most powerful feelings ever.
Beautiful/useful is subjective.
References
"we need to address the underlying issue - how can we empower the children so that these phrases are not needed?" I feel that you're getting at the underlying issue of society not seeing children as citizens - active participants in their communities. We tend to hold them in a position of 'becoming', undervaluing what they have to offer and limiting their voice.